


The Purrfect Crime

by Kayavak



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Cat Puns, M/M, Poor Jack, Underwear Theft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-19
Updated: 2016-07-19
Packaged: 2018-07-25 09:18:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7527085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kayavak/pseuds/Kayavak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was just a favor for a friend.  One month of cat sitting, Jack could handle that.  It will be simple. Too bad Kit has other plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Purrfect Crime

“Crisse, not again.” Jack slumped down against the kitchen wall and dropped in head into his hands.

_Three weeks earlier ___

“Jacky, come’on. It’s only a month. You know Kit is a purrrrrrfect…..”

“No and if you use one more cat pun I’m hanging up.” Jack reached up and rubbed his eyes. He couldn’t take much more of this. He was pretty sure that ten phone calls in three days fell under some type of torture law. He held firm for the first seven, but midway around the tenth call (the second time Kenny Skyped him) his mask slipped. Kent, who knew him better than anyone except Shitty and his parents, saw his moment of weakness and went in for the kill.

“Please,” Kent said, “it’s only a month. I can’t board her for that long, she would go crazy and if I left her alone with a sitter checking in I would come back to sea of destruction.”

Jack sighed. He knew Kit Purrson, despite her sweet nature around people, was a vindictive beast when she was angry. Once Kent was stuck overnight in New York because of a flight delay and when he got home Kit had somehow managed to destroy the laces (and only the laces) on all of his shoes. Jack still giggled sometimes when he laced up his trainers. 

The Falconers had dropped out of the Cup race early, Kent was going to Russia with Tater for almost three weeks. He was desperate to find someone to babysit his fur child and Jack, his best friend, former teammate, ex-boyfriend, and teammate to his current boyfriend was the logical choice.

“Kent,” Jack started and he swore he could hear his friend’s ears perk up, “I don’t know anything about cats. She’d probably hate living here. My place is half the size of yours, I’m hardly home, I have no toys for her, and…”

Kent jumped in laughing, “Dude, that’s what you’re worried about? She’s a cat, not a toddler. Give her some string and a crumpled up piece of newspaper and she’ll entertain herself for HOURS. It’s not that hard. She’ll love hanging with you while Alexei and I are gone. She sleeps twenty hours, eats, poops, and then runs around like a crazy thing for ten minutes.”

“I know, but…”

“You can take care of a cat for a month, I promise.” Kent’s voice dropped from playful to earnest. “Honestly, you’re the only one I would trust with her. You know I love my family, but they just don’t care about animals. They think she’s just a thing.” Kent sighed. “One last time, please Jack.”

Jack cracked. “FINE Kenny, I’ll babysit your damn cat.”

Later, Tater swore he could hear Kent’s cheer all the way Providence.

Present day

“Crisse, not again.” Jack slumped down against the kitchen wall and dropped in head into his hands. 

The first time Kit escaped Jack was sure she was gone for good. It was his worst nightmare come true. He lost or killed Kent’s cat. The fight would be even worse than their breakup on draft night and Kenny would really never speak to him again. After the years of working their way back to friends, Jack didn’t know if he could go through that again. He spent three hours looking around his neighborhood and calling animal control before he collapsed on his back step. He was reaching into his pocket for his phone when Kit came rushing into the yard, tail held high, and a red striped sock held proudly in her mouth.  


Since then she managed to escape daily and every time she brought back a trophy. A black sock, two pairs of briefs, two yellow socks, a white sock, and possibly the smallest pair of red shorts known to mankind. When Kit brought him the first pair of briefs, Jack knew he was in trouble.

“Why, Kit? Where are you getting these? How are you getting them? Why can’t you bring me dead birds like every other cat. Soon this will be on the weekend news.” Jack mumbled from his hands. Kit butted his elbow and gave a trilling, “murr?”

Jack shook his head. “Yes, it will. Following a bizarre string of underwear thefts, Jack Zimmermann, star center of the Providence Falconers, was arrested today. He claimed it was his ex-friend Kent Parson’s cat but we all know he’s just a pervert. Kit Purrsen, the cat in question and internet celebrity, has never done anything wrong, ever, in her life. We know this and we love her. Details at ten.”

Kit hopped to the counter where the rest of her prizes sat. Jack let his head fall back into the cabinet door just in time to take a sock to the face. He sighed and stood up.

“We have to return them, ok?” He cupped Kit’s fluffy face in his hands and gently knocked his forehead to hers. “Now how are we going to figure out whom they belong too?”

**Author's Note:**

> A quick hello and thank you to anyone reading this! This story has been bouncing around my head for a few weeks so I decided to churn out a few chapters of awkward cuteness. 
> 
> Inspired by this story: http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-35859813


End file.
